Running

Training for a 5k- Week 1

March 8, 2015

Alright, it’s time to get serious. You are now officially training for a 5k, and week 1 starts tomorrow.

Let’s make sure we are clear about something here.

You are now my property. I own you and you own nothing.

You can give your heart to your family, but your ass belongs to running.

So what do you need to do?

RUN.

The end.

Running is easy. You just strap on your running boots, buckle up your running vest, and glue on your running helmet. It is one of the easiest sports to do.

So go run.

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If you’re still reading, it’s because you don’t really know how to run or where to run or what to do. And that’s why we’re here.

For many runners, you will wonder why you are running. What’s the point of all of this, if it doesn’t take me anywhere? Can’t I just drive?

And at times, you will wonder if someone is chasing you. Why else would you be running?

Someone is chasing you. It’s your former you.

DO NOT LET IT CATCH YOU

Before we begin, I have some advice:

1) Get a partner. Running alone is miserable. Running with a friend is twice as miserable. Share the misery.

2) Don’t worry if you miss a run. Nobody will know. Nobody is looking. Nobody cares…except for your former self.

3) Wear lots of neon. Neon makes you look cool, especially if you have tattoos and sunglasses.

4) Respect the rules of the road, and don’t mess around with people’s property or run through someone’s yard. Only high school boys think this runny jumpy stuff looks cool.

 

OK, here’s the plan for Training for a 5k- Week 1.

Depending on your current running status, you will either be a Beginner (“I have not been running lately”, or “I may be allergic to running”) or an Intermediate (“I have been running lately but need to step my game up”, or “I was allergic to running but I’m on medication”)

Beginner

GOAL: COMMIT TO A TRAINING SCHEDULE

Sunday- 30 MIN WALK

I fooled you. I told you that the work starts on Monday. That was a lie. The work starts today, so go for an easy 30-minute walk in your new neon shorts and perfectly white sneakers. Get them a little dirty so you look like a real runner.

Monday- 20 MINUTE RUN/WALK COMBO

Today we begin. I want you to run for 1 minute, and then walk for 1 minute, and repeat that for 10 total minutes. At that point, you have 2 options: continue that pattern, or do 3 minutes running and 2 minutes walking for the rest of the time.

Make adjustments as needed. If you need to walk, please walk. If you need to stop, stop. Don’t be a hero. Save that for week 8.

Or maybe you can run the majority of the time. That’s fine. Just don’t push it.

Tuesday- 30 MINUTE WALK

Recovery. Take it easy and enjoy the rest. You deserve it.

Wednesday- 20 MINUTE RUN/WALK COMBO

Same as Monday, but try to find a consistent pattern. I like 3min run/2min walk but that’s just me. Stick to the same route, or switch it up. It doesn’t matter.

Thursday- 30 MINUTE WALK

Just relax, Prefontaine. The goal is to be a good runner FOR LIFE, not for the week. Take a walk and let your body recover.

Friday- 30 MINUTE RUN/WALK COMBO

This is it; the big one. You will add an additional 50% to your longest run of the week. And not only that, I want you to run for AT LEAST 5 MINUTES before you go to a walk. And, the total amount of time spent running should be AT LEAST 20 minutes. YOU CAN DO THIS!

Saturday- 30 MINUTE WALK

ENJOY THIS WONDERFUL EASY DAY! TAKE AN EASY WALK AND CHILL.

Sunday- DO NOTHING TODAY

DO NOTHING! IF YOU RUN TODAY I WILL KNOW.

You can play some basketball or cycle or mow the lawn, but don’t run. Just don’t. Because I said so.

 

Intermediate

GOAL: IMPROVE YOUR PACE AND STAMINA

Sunday- 30 MIN EASY WALK

I fooled you. I told you that the work starts on Monday. That was a lie. The work starts today, so go for an easy 30-minute run in your new neon shorts and perfectly white sneakers. Get them a little dirty so you look like a real runner while we are training for a 5k.

Monday- 3 MILES EASY

If you don’t know what this means, go back to “beginner”.

Track Work Tuesday- 400 METER REPEATS

Holy helmetshine, this is it. The big day- your first workout.This won’t kill you, but it will certainly hurt you. In a good way.

Run 400 meters at about 75%, then jog 400 meters at a light shuffle.

You can repeat this 4, 6, or 8 times, depending on how you feel.

Run 4 laps to cool down, and don’t forget to stretch.

Wednesday- 5 MILES LSD

Today is all about finding your happy place through LSD. All it takes is one good session of LSD to change your mind, body, and soul forever.

Enjoy the Long Slow Distance. Take it easy out there, you crazy diamond.

Thursday- 3 MILES EASY

Today, we relax. Tomorrow, we die.

Fartlek Friday- 4 MILE FARTLEK

“Fartlek” is Swedish for “speedplay”. If you say it in front of a group of high school boys they’ll think you’re saying “fart lick”, by the way. So you can choose to correct them or run with the joke.

The goal of a fartlek run is to switch gears, going from an easy run to an uptempo pace for the majority of your run.

Go easy for the first mile. Nice conversation pace.

Now choose some objects that are semi-equidistant and run at about 70% until you hit one, and then drop back to your normal running pace. Examples of waypoints are stoplights, power poles, major intersections, or foodcarts if you live in Portland. Next time you get to your object, switch gears again. Repeat. Repeat. Repoot.

So you alternate between 70% and 50% pace over and over again for 2 straight miles. KEEP THIS IN MIND SO YOU DON’T GO ALL JOHN RAMBO ON THE FIRST HARD SEGMENT.

Then finish the last mile at a conversation pace.

Stretch and drink a few beers or lemonades or whatever tickles your fancy. You earned it. You are now officially training for a 5k.

Saturday- EASY 35 MINUTES

Let your body recover with a nice easy 35 minutes. Distance is not important today.

Sunday- DO NOTHING TODAY

DO NOTHING! IF YOU RUN TODAY I WILL KNOW.

You can play some basketball or cycle or mow the lawn, but don’t run. Just don’t. Because I said so.

 

Congratulations; week one of training for a 5k is in the books. See you next week.

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3 Comments

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